Stop beating yourself up! You’re amazing!

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Listen to your inner voice. Are you your own best friend or worst enemy? 

Working in the gym I come in contact with a lot of people and most of the time, I can tell if someone is their own best friend or their worst enemy. 

Have you ever thought about how we talk to ourselves, and how we can get in our own way when it comes to making changes and improving our lives?

When we think about it, it’s very eye-opening, because I think a lot of us say things to ourselves about ourselves that we would never think to say to someone else! 

I am no better than anyone else. My inner voice isn’t always gentle and I can be guilty of being my worst critic, too, but I’ve learned to be a friendly critic and change some of my inner dialogue.

Today, I’m going to share how important it is to monitor that little voice in your head to help you FEEL better in your mind, body and spirit … and help make progress toward all your goals! 

Have you watched that movie called Inside Out? In it, there are all these emotions, that live inside a little girl’s head and they have real personalities that are living in her mind. There are conflicts and crises trying to keep the little girl happy. In real life, we have this voice that narrates your life and constantly monitors everything you do, say, and think. I love that movie and the perspective it shares. If you haven’t watched, I highly recommend it and pay attention to the lessons to be learned. Sometimes, we just have to take time to process why we feel an emotion before we can move on from it.

Best Friend or Worst Enemy? 

Let’s be honest, friends can tell us things we don’t want to hear and still be our friends and sometimes being a little judgy can help us improve, right?  But when does that go too far?

If you pay attention to that voice, and you know what one I’m talking about… you’re not alone. It’s probably the biggest stumbling block that we ALL have in making healthy changes in our lives!

That voice can nag at you, put you down, judge how well you do things or what you look like, constantly tell you all the things you should be doing versus what you’re actually doing, I would venture to say that there are a lot of occasions where you are saying things to yourself that you wouldn’t dream of saying to someone else!  

How often have you had a setback or did something you didn’t think was “perfect,” then that darn little “voice” went on and blew things way out of proportion and turned into a rant about how your life – or at least one area of your life – is just one big failure?

This voice can be on autopilot, focusing only on the negative things in your life. It might write off anything positive that happens as a fluke. It can call you names, or label you in some kind of negative way. It can also make you set impossibly high standards so that you feel overwhelmed or defeated before you even do anything!

But there’s something to remember about that voice. Just like with our behaviors, you can get into habits with your thinking without even realizing it. It’s kind of like biting your nails or twirling your earrings!

Become your own BFF

We can change our relationship with ourselves if we can change our words and we can start by changing our habits. Habits aren’t hard and fast, with a little time and effort, we can CHANGE them! That nagging, critical inner voice can be there out of HABIT. And you ABSOLUTELY can turn it around.

It’s important to remember that you are NOT your thoughts.  You have thoughts, and they come and go. And over time, as long as you’re paying attention, you can begin to put them in their place. 

Eckhart Tolle has a great quote: 

“Rather than being your thoughts and emotions, be the awareness behind them.” 

The real power you have is being able to consciously create and choose certain thoughts over others. 

We can change our world if we can only change our thoughts.

Your body responds to your mind, so if you’re allowing your thoughts to run wild like a stampede, there’s no telling what the end result will be. 

One thing that I say to my clients on a regular basis is: 

Be careful what you say to yourself in your mind, your body is listening. If you say you can’t do it, you can’t. I promise you you can do whatever you set your mind to.

You can change the dialog in your inner voice and the things that you say in your mind slowly. Every time you catch yourself saying things like I can’t…  or I’m not good enough to… tack on the word ‘yet’ at the end.

Change your thoughts and you can change your world

So, how do you change your thoughts? 

    1. First of all, you have to pay attention to that inner voice and what it’s saying. Being “AWARE” of the conversation in your head is the most important piece of the puzzle.
    2. Every time you start to head down a negative or judgy road with yourself, stop and replace that thought with something positive.
    3. With practice, you can start changing your stories and begin telling yourself things like:

I am healthy and strong 

I can try that

I will get better with practice

I’m getting better

I am not my past

I’ve got this

In a very short period of time, you can feel more motivated and confident in your abilities.

Can you think of some other ways that you can change your thoughts to help you feel better? 

I realize that you may think this is frivolous or weird… but just in case it does, TRY it before you judge it. 🙂 

When we can learn to love ourselves and be our best friend rather than our worst enemy we can change how we view the world and that will show in the goals we set and the steps we take to reach them.

Treat yourself with respect and love and you’ll start to feel more motivated almost immediately! You deserve it.

Are you in for paying attention to your inner voice today, and CONSCIOUSLY creating the thoughts that you want to embody?   If you find yourself having a negative thought write it down and ask yourself, what would you say to your friend if it was your friend that had said that to you? Start changing your inner dialogue. You can change your entire world. 

I hope you have a great day! Till next time!